heading home

ate a lot today for a mock thanksgiving feast, but i will be on the road a lot tomorrow driving home so I probably wont eat much. I am going home for Thanksgiving break the eating is different, at school I can skip meals but there is also alot of junk food and dessert to binge on and alcohol, but at home I cant get away with skipping meals too often, but the food to binge on is a little bit healthier. I also walk everywhere at school, but at least I have a treadmill at home.

I have to be pretty careful at home, I have a cousin who was anorexic she went to rehab but she is still really skinny so I don’t know if she is really recovered or not, but my mom would notice. over the summer she took a long look at me and told me not to get to skinny, so she is definitly not oblivious to the changes in my body. No one at school really noticed that I had lost weight over the summer except one guy friend and my roommate

somehow still 85.8

grrr

i was doing so well today it was 5:00 and i had only eaten 100 cals then i was cooking for an event and i decided that i wanted broth, then i decided i wanted rice and carrots and onions in that broth. I ate it and i was full, but then there was pizza and i scarfed down a whole piece in seconds, i also ate 2 spoonfuls of nutella, some cookie dough, and 3 biscuts ahhh i never binge but this was a binge, and the pizza gave me horrible heartburn and i just felt terrible so i wanted to go for a walk that turned into a run. I didnt even pay attention to mylegs or heart hurtingonly my stomach i wanted to throw up so badly, but i didnt and im now stuck with all those calories i need to stay out of the kitchen!! but i just really love to cook

86.8

and sore legs

will never eat fast food again

On saturday I ate Mcdonalds for breakfast, krispy kreme for lunch, and taco bell for dinner it was pretty disgusting. On the upside I don't think I will ever want to eat any of that ever again. I have no idea how many calories I ate on saturday all those calories along with a beer and two shots gross! at least I danced a ton so I had to burn some calories but def not enough.
I just need to get back on track i ran 2 miles yesterday and just got back from running another 2 miles. off to do 100 crunches and 20 pushups :)

im back

i deleted my blog and then while browsing through all you blogs i decided to undelete mine
hope you all are well, i missed the support and how nice everyone on here is :)

bleh

Worked out at the gym for 2 hours yesterday but then i ate a ton of pizza gross also I made a cheesecake last night and ate a slice today which is like 400 cals, eating way too much. also Im making cookies tonight with some friends tonight and will have to eat at least one. I dont want to have to give up my social life to be thin but all my friends are super into food! But tomorrow I will only eat dinner, also with friends. im about 85 today I want to get to 80 so bad!
also anyone interested in being a texting buddy?